There's a difference between a loyal friend, and a person who is a LEACH to you.
The Leach is going to try to make you believe that they are LOYAL, and that can be quite easy to pull off. They will try to do all these "loveable" and "nobile" things for you, but it usually comes with a VERY high price. Your soul.
The smart one's won't outright ASK something of you, but rather try to guilt you into doing something thats against your better judgment.
If you are confused about what to do in a situation like so, realize this:
Loyalty is bravery.
Bravery as in: they take care of they're own buisness, so when it's time for you guys to get together, it's only time for fun, and to make memories.
If you find yourself getting in the middle of someone's conflict, stop and realize what you are doing. Now YOUR in the position for the finger to be pointed at you, while the coward who claims their a "friend" sits back while you take all the blows.
Now thats not to say to be mean to someone and try to not help. Everyone deserves a shot, or MAYybe.... rarely two, but if it's something that you find yourself CONSTANTLY have to coach the person, thats bad news.
Sometimes it's just a matter of a person needing to mature. MAybe you've been through harsher times then them, and you've matured faster then most. That DOES happen.
If you find yourself STRUGGLING to make sense of what this person in your life, who claims to be a friend, is doing, it's going to be where they just "YES" you to death, or say WHATEVER justto get you to stay around. Doesn't matter what they say, or how they do it, as long as your still their to justify all the bad shyt that they do, they could care less about you, or anyone else. Or what they've said or done, because eventually, when you speak up, they will disappear, because now your someone who can expose their game.
I've made a lot of mistakes with people. People who claimed to be "friends" of the CLOSEST verity, only to have them COMPLETELY turn on me, as if they never knew me before, without even a blink of an eye. Sickening....
People that have fooled me into hating other people, while claiming that if I don't, I wouldn't be a "good friend". But once you speak up on how you TRULY feel about whats going on, what happens? They FLEE! Because they don't want to be around anyone who can expose them for what they really are.
They will then go on to find a new group, and spread the word on how your "such a terrible person".
Well ofcorse you would be "bad" to someone who is scum, because a "terrible person" in a scumbag's eyes is someone who will expose them, so they'll say ANYTHING to have people hate you and try to stay away from you at that point of exposing them. And when new group gets wise to whats going on, the scum will find ANY excuse at all, EVEN IF IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE, to try to get away from that group as well, and go to the next.
Actually, the more ridiculous the excuse to get away from the current group is, the better for the scum, because THEN, if you get mad, they have material to pitch to the next group they try to destroy, about "how terrible" they're "old friend" is. Combine they're sob story with some good deeds, and you can easily have people just keep you around because they feel bad. But thats all scum needs to get their foot in the door.
Now i'm no fool. I know who people are right from the start, but what i'm ESPECIALLY saying is that you have to be careful of blinding yourself to these situations. It's VERY easy when you need something. They can SMELL IT.
I did it because I wanted to make a couple of movie projects, and needed people to help, so I pretended to not see the full extend of how dirty the people I was dealing with were, when it was CLEARLY right in front of my face, from the start. Other friends and peers even telling me how scummy the person I was dealing with was. And what did I wind up doing? Fighting with the people who ACTUALLY contributed to my projects, and the people who were the passionate ones. The people who I didn't have to baby, or couch into anything.
Because I was blinded, and I guess the scum I had by my side knew that these people could expose them, and the scum can't have their #1 person that they leech off of have people filling their head with truth, now can they?
I was a fool, and my eagerness blinded me.
The bottom line is, some people just THRIVE off of negativity, no matter what kind. Small or large amounts. So I hope this helps into making the blurry line alittle clearer for people who might also be in a similar situation, and who are seeing what is going on too, but ignoring it, and just need alittle kick in the a$$.
- Joey JcM